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Tuesday, April 14, 2009

Monday Night Heroes Blog: To You Hatin' Ass Haters...






Okay, this will be a Heroes blog that will be spoiler-free. I want to talk about hating.

So technically, this is a rant. I'm okay with that. I haven't ranted for awhile. Let's see if I'm still any good at it...

There's just SOME shit that works my LAST FUCKING NERVE.

Okay, I like to Tweet during Heroes commercials. It's something I've started doing since my girlfriend Lacii got in her car accident. Being serious for a second, that kinda took the wind out of my sails. Whenever I think about writing my Heroes blog, I thought about that day, and I couldn't bring myself to write it. But I hated not saying anything about my favorite show EVER, so I decided to Tweet during the commercials.

So, if you use Tweetdeck, you can have a search column, and I search out all the tweets relating to “Heroes” so I can discuss the show with people that like the show like me.

Don't get me wrong, I'm not a blind rabid fanboy. It's ok if you're a former fan and maybe you don't like the direction. It's kewl. You are entitled to your opinion. That's just keeping it real...

But you haterz. You motherfucking, wack-ass, no-life, attention-seeking, bottom-feeding, never-do-nothing, down-talking, couch-potato-ass haters trip me the fuck OUT.

I'm not going to mention dude by name, but somebody actually tweeted He's going to watch “the garbage that is Heroes.”

Seriously? Seriously?!

Dead ass, that's hate. You are going on Twitter to do nothing but get a rise out of somebody for hating on something they like.

Guess what? It worked. You got me. I gotta speak on it.

I hate creamed corn. Can't stand the shit. Looks like and has the consistency of vomit. What the FUCK would I look like sitting in Cracker Barrel over a bowl of that infant vomit saying “DAMN, I HATE THIS SHIT. THIS IS SOME NASTY SHIT. WHO COOKED THIS SHIT? IT'S LIKE THEY SPOONED IT OUT OF A GOAT'S ASS AND MICROWAVED IT. MMM, THIS IS SOME NASTY SHIT!”

What would I look like? I would look just like that hating ass nut-hugger who decided to Tweet that he was actually sitting down to watch something he hates. But really, don't that make you look like a fucking nimrod to watch something you hate?

I hate Fox News. I do. I deleted the channel from the autoprogram. I don't want to hear anything anyone associated with that channel has to say.

You will NOT SEE me Tweeting about watching Bill O'Reilly and how much I hate him. I'd just say “I hate him.” Not “I hate him but I can't stop watching!”

But with all that said, I'm really not that mad. I am a staunch supporter of the 1st Amendment, and I will fight for your right to say all the dumb shit you say, because it gives me the right to say stuff like this about your helmet-wearing short-bus-chasing ass. If there was anything authentic in you, you'd just stop watching, much like I am about Smallville. I can still talk about the show and criticize it as a fan who's unhappy with the direction, but I'm not 'hating' on it. After this season, though, I might be done.

So I guess “Heroes” is so popular, it's gotta be attacked by the counter-culture. So whatever to you hating-ass harpies, you're still talking about it, you're helping us to top the trends and you're making people ask “well, why do you hate it?” Some of those people come check it out and find out you all are just fucking full of shit.

Just like my man Katt Williams said, Haters don't hate us, they just hate GOOD SHIT. Cuz at some point they were hopeful, and now they ain't, so they just hate.

If the show sucks, just stop fucking watching it, dumbass. You're helping it to stay on the air, you Hating-Ass-Haters.

-ere'bodee's favorite mega, blogninja

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